This is an excerpt from the transcript of a class I gave on narrative psychology…
Q: Does Change or Steadfast always affect your approach?”
Not necessarily — It doesn’t have to because sometimes problems aren’t between the inside and the outside, sometimes problems are between the inside and itself, and problems are between the outside and itself. In other words, when you look from a “they” perspective, you’re not personally involved. You don’t have any feelings about it one way or another. You are a judge sitting on a bench and you have to make things work out between the parties, and you don’t have any favorites, ostensibly. And then in that case, it’s a completely external inequity you are dealing with, and so you are going to be putting all your work out there. The whole notion of being a do-er or be-er will be applied to the situation as to how you deal with it. But, change and steadfast will not have anything to do with it. Change and steadfast will be “do I try to resolve it, or do I stop trying to resolve it externally”.
Whereas for an internal situation, in which you feel a certain way, or a lack of motivation for something, and you want to create a motivation for something, or you have tendencies or drives that you want to get rid of, you are working with yourself, and there really is no external manifestation of it, it’s yourself you are trying to work with.
“I don’t like being this kind of person, why do I say this or do that?” . “Maybe I can change myself inside.” Well, that’s not really change in change and steadfast, that’s be-er’s work, and be-er’s working to alter themselves inside, because they are trying to snuff it, internally. And if they are trying to work with themselves inside, if they eventually give up on it, then that’s change.
And if they stick with it, then that’s steadfast. How long do they have to keep working with themselves before themselves change. Did they give up too soon, because whatever was holding them back was just ready to give because of their persistence in trying to think a certain way, in terms of Zen or in terms of controlling our emotion. Could they have broken the back of it, if they had lasted just a little bit longer. Or is it a useless endeavor because they really can’t change that no matter how they try. That’s the leap of faith for a be-er, internal working person.
Do-ers and be-ers both have external only problems and internal only problems and problems between the outside and the inside. And when they are between the outside and the inside, both do-ers and be-ers can perceive it as being this is where it ought to be resolved; externally or internally. And then once they determine where it has to be resolved, what makes them a be-er or do-er is when they determine whether it’s inside or outside and has to be resolved, where they are trying to strike a balance. So, a lot of stuff is going on in that. But, change and steadfast is do you switch from looking from outside to inside, or inside to outside and the other one is at the crossfire, do you stop trying or give up on it. Or do you keep going — inside do you keep going or give up on it. Those are the four change and steadfast issues in the change/steadfast quad.
Read the entire transcript here.